Look who is 5?!?!?

I seriously cannot believe that my first born is 5 years old! Where did the time go? Of course this pic is of him at around 6 months but it is our all time favorite!
What a wonder this little boy has been and continues to be. He loves dinosaurs and superheroes and, above all his momma and sister. He is so totally in love with our pool - something that thrills C and I since we both love the water so much!! He is very stubborn and wants things his way, but he is working hard on taking turns and letting other people win - even at Heigh-Ho-Cherrio. My most favorite things about my son is his sense of adventure. He bravely takes on each day with a sense of courage that I wish I could muster. I love how he isn't afraid of showing affection towards others. He also thinks that every rock he finds on the playground is a fossil and that he must being it back for his momma. Needless to say, there have been times that the washing machine has washed more rocks than clothes....According to his teacher, I am his favorite person. This doesn't sit well with Dad but we both know that the time will come when Daddy will be #1 over Momma (at least in public). For now, I enjoy putting him to bed because that is when I get to sing him his special song. Right now, he still asks for it so I push through my weariness to take him in my arms and sing to him. when I first started singing it, he fit nicely in my arms. Now, he takes up my lap and then some! I do not look forward to the time when he will not let me sing to him - but I WILL sneak in and sing to him after he has gone to sleep!!
One thing that is really showing now is his faith. They found a worm on the playground at school. K took it upon himself to guard the worm. One classmate stepped on it and Keegan yelled, "Stop it! You are hurting on of God's special creatures!" (Luckily, the worm was fine.) He sings Christian radio songs and asks me questions about God and Jesus. He always asks "Why?" and I try my best to answer him or find out the answer.
I am beyond excited about getting to spend the summer with this amazing boy. I am going to be present in the moments with him since he starts Kinder next year. I know that this will bring on some changes in him and I pray that they are for the better. But I look forward to seeing how the gifts that I know God placed in him come to life and change this world for the better. He truly is a blessing and I could not imagine my life without him, my sunshine!

Here comes summer!!

Woo hoo!! We are seriously on the tail end of the school year. With both my husband and I being teachers, I was so super excited about this summer - would be the first one in FOUR years that I would not be teaching summer school!! But, then we got the news that my DH will be working for the overwhelming majority of the summer on curriculum development....boo!! This is also the summer before K starts kindergarten. I really wanted this summer to be fantastic for all of us...guess it will just be me and the kids. A will still go to her daycare which will give me time to work with K on stuff to prepare for school next year. To help me get jazzed about the change in plans for the summer, I decided to create a bucket list of things I want to to do this summer.
To start our summer, C and I will be taking K to Walt Disney World...just us and him. Miss A gets some alone time with her grandparents. C and I decided many moons ago that we wanted to do something special for our kiddos the summer before they start school and that something is Disney World. C and I are not telling K anything about it...though we are planting seeds in K's mind about it. He will not know what we are doing until we get there. Since we are flying, we don't know if he will be more excited about his first plane trip or Disney. Now that our trip is a few short weeks away, we are getting super excited. I decided that I wanted to use a Disney travel agent and boy and I glad I did! She is amazing!! She made all of our reservations - including meal reservations!! Be sure to contact Elyssa at http://mickeytravels.com/.
This is our motto:


After we get back from our trip, we have two weeks of swim lessons. K is super excited! He loves his swim teacher. This will be A's first year. Pretty much, her class is 30 minutes of non-stop crying from the random dunking that the little ones get. The purpose of this class is to teach the little ones how to save themselves if they ever fall into the pool and no one is around to save them. It was rough when I had to be the one in the pool dunking K for two years. For Miss A, she gets daddy - hopefully.
As for the rest of the summer, it will be filled with so much activity! There are crafts, adventures, and serious cooking (one item is to find the best ice cream recipe) that will be going on so be sure to check in and see what we are up to!!

Call for prayers

So, there are two precious children and their families that I know of that are struggling with illness right now. Both are patients at Children's in Dallas.Both are under the age of two. And they need prayers of healing - BIG TIME!! One is a little girl that was diagnosed just this week with a malignant neuroblastoma. One is a little boy that has had an aggressive asthma attack. As a mom, I am brought to my knees in prayer for these two precious children and pray for them throughout the day. I feel so very, very grateful that I have two healthy children but know that can change in an instant. We had a terrifying experience with K when he had just turned two.
It started with K running a high fever. He woke up around 5 in the morning and we got up to give him some medicine to try to control the fever. While C was holding him, I went into the bathroom to put the medicine away and get a cold washcloth. K went into hysterics because he wanted me to be with him (he tends to want mom when he is not well). Next thing, C is shouting, "Oh God!! His eyes are rolling back!!" I rushed in to see K starting to have a seizure. C was completely freaking out. I yelled at him to go call 911 and I place K on his side on our bed and started praying over him, asking for God's angels to protect him. I was familiar with what to do in case someone is having a seizure since one of the kiddos in our church is epileptic. I knew not to restrain him but to stand by to make sure he didn't fall off the bed. C also called my parents, who lived behind us at the time and they quickly rushed over. The seizure lasted about 2-3 minutes (longest of my life) and completely knocked K out. I called our preacher and asked for prayers. He said to keep him updated. The paramedics arrived within a few minutes of our call (I was bummed..K loves firetrucks!) and started checking him out. But K was so totally knocked out that he was no responding. His vitals came back fine. The head paramedic said that they could transport him to Children's in the ambulance but that, since K's vitals were strong and steady, we could easily transfer him ourselves with the extra cost of an ambulance trip. I also called the answering service for our family doctor, and she quickly called us back (we LOVE Dr. Callie!!). She said that she would call ahead to Children's to give them the heads up that he was coming so that we didn't have a long wait in the ER. So, we did. I sat next to K in the back with a trash can (he had thrown up when he came around). He was still crying and upset. We tried to keep him as calm as possible out of fear of another seizure. We arrived at Children's ER and I whisked K in to get checked out. We did not have a long wait at all. I cannot tell you how calming and fabulous the nurses and doctors were. While we were sitting there, our preacher walked in. The feeling of relief that washed over me cannot be described. We dearly love our preacher. He was one of the first to visit us after K was born. He baptised K. He feels such a connection to our boy. And, here he was when we felt so scared. Keep in mind this is about 6 o'clock in the morning. For him to get out of bed so early and come over meant a lot to us. He talked to K and then we all prayed. He stayed with us when the doctor came in to update us. The doctor said it was a febrile seizure. Basically, due to the fit that K threw, his body temp skyrocketed. The seizure was his body doing an emergency shutdown in order to protect itself. by this time, K was his usual self. He was checking out all of the medical equipment, playing with an inflated surgical glove, and munching on a Popsicle. We were released and headed home.
My biggest fear was that this was the first sign of epilepsy. To date, this fear has been unfounded. Come to find out, febrile seizures run on both sides of our family. C had one when he was a toddler. So, we try to always keep K's fevers down and keep him calm. He had a few neurological twitches for a few months afterwards but that was just his body booting back up. Freaked me out.
This incident made me extremely grateful for many things, above all the health of my children. As a parent, the last thing you want is for your child to suffer. The inability to control it was so frustrating. But, then, I realized. I am not meant to be in control. God is the one in control and I must trust in him.
So, here I am, praying for these two children. I know that God has his healing hands upon them and that he is with them. I lift up my prayers for these children and their families. If you could, take a minute to do the same.

When is it time to let go?

So....I have had a struggle of sorts over the last year or so. The struggle has been when to know to let go of a longtime friendship. When you have been close friends with someone since childhood, when do you let go? For me, that is a question that I am having problems figuring out.

Let me back track....Susie and I met in middle school and were close friends. Then, she started hanging out with a different group of friends when we started high school and we drifted apart. Slowly, we rebuilt our friendship and it was going strong. In college, we were both super busy with school and jobs and lived in two different towns. But, we would make time for a call to check in and it felt like we had been talking the entire month instead of every few weeks. We would visit and were each other's maid of honor at each of our weddings. Everything was going good until Susie got pregnant unexpectedly with her first child. I noticed something was up whenever I got back from CO and Susie and her husband came over to drop off our key since they had been the pet sitters for us. They quickly dropped of the key and left - not the usual chatting and seeing how the trip was...odd...very odd. I just passed it off that they were tired. No biggie. A few nights later, we had invited them over to dinner at my parents house with some good family friends. There, in the middle of dinner, Susie's husband announced they were pregnant. I was speechless with hurt. I quickly ate my food and left the table and went upstairs. I was so incredibly hurt....deeply hurt....not because she was pregnant but because she didn't tell me first...I was merely one part of the crowd...well, she took it that I was upset that she was pregnant and I wasn't. See, at this time, C&I were trying to get pregnant. It ended up take us over a year and seeing a fertility specialist in order to get pregnant. Now, keep in mind that I work at a school with pregnant teenagers....I was surrounded by people who were pregnant and really didn't want to be. That was tough, but Susie being pregnant wasn't hurtful for me. She was the ONE person in the world that I could honestly rejoice for her in this blessing. But, no. She didn't trust that I would be happy for her and that hurt. She didn't want to tell me by myself I guess out of fear of what I would do. And it was that lack of trust in me that hurt me so deeply....but I brushed it aside and got on with being there for her during a very difficult pregnancy. As time went on, we would see each other occasionally but our friendship was never the same. It got to the point that when she went to the hospital for emergency surgery, I found out from one of her co-workers. She said that she didn't want me to be worried when there was nothing that they knew and then she had the emergency surgery and there wasn't time to call. Again, hurt. Around this time, I noticed that whenever I would call Susie, she would be too busy to take me call. If I really wanted to talk to her, I would have to wait for her to call me and the conversations were usually one sided on her part - no questions about me or my life. So, I stopped calling since I felt like I was interrupting her life. She would call me every so often when she was driving to school since that was the one time she was by herself. I understood and wasn't hurt by it, just adapting to it. When I left for maternity leave with my second child, things stopped. No visit at the hospital. No visit to see me or the baby until three weeks after the baby was born. No phone calls. When I returned to school, no more morning phone calls. I just figured she was super busy. Since it had been about 5 months since we had talked, I didn't feel it was right to invite her and her family to my son's bday party. I felt like asking them to spend money on a present when we haven't had any communication was wrong. Then, came my birthday. No usual happy bday phone call. Then came Susie's bday. I sent her a text (we were out of town) to tell her happy birthday and her response was "Thanks". Hmmmm..... So, I festered with hurt and anger and sadness until, one day, I had enough of carrying all of this within me. So, earlier this year, I sent her an email and let it all out. Her response was that she felt like she was the only one doing the calling and I explained my side. So, every so often, I'd send her an email. She never sent one to me without it being a response to an email I had sent. When we were heading out for a trip, I sent her an email asking about information about the area we were going to since that is where she had gone to college...no response. I sent an email to her last week just checking in....no response. We invited her and her family to to parties we are hosting at our house, both of which have been "declined".

Ok, so I get it. I am no longer wanted in her life. While I wished she felt like she could talk to me honestly and openly, she doesn't. I just get the silent treatment. I do not know what I have done to so wrong her nor am I given the opportunity to apologize. I have prayed about this and have talked to various other people and know that I will be ok. But how do I convince that middle school girl inside of me to let go? How do I comfort her tears and tell her it will be ok?